Marriage can be one of the biggest blessings in your life...or one of the hardest relationships you deal with. Many people think of it as consumers – what can I get out of it? I challenge you to see marriage, rather, as a beautiful investment! It is hard work, but your efforts can pay off in the long run! Here are ten quick tips to help steer you toward a healthier, happier marriage:

Never Stop Learning About Each Other – You're either growing together or growing apart. There are always more things to discover!

Go to Bed at the Same Time – This is a fairly easy way to ensure you have daily check-ins with each other. Consistent communication is relationship gold!

Listen to Understand – Your responses will be better received if your spouse knows you hear and give validity to what he is saying. Be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger” -James 1:19

Turn Toward Each Other – Before running to a friend to talk about marriage issues, be sure to talk to your spouse first.

Don't Assume the Worst About Each Other's Motives - Give each other grace as you listen to each other and gather all the facts.

Communicate Hurts Quickly - Conflict delayed is conflict amplified.

Own Your Junk – Be willing to make the first move and take responsibility for any mistakes or harm you have done without defensiveness.

Healthy Marriages Thrive in Community – Surround yourselves with other friends – single or married – who you can hang out with for fun in the good times and lean on for support in the hard times.

Seek Out Mentor Couples – Build a network of people with healthy marriages who are a life stage or two ahead of you and can pass on what they’ve learned.

Love is a Commitment - Choose to act on that commitment you made to love this person for better or for worse. Waiting for the other person to serve first can devolve into a stalemate and growing resentment on both sides.

I get it - no marriage is perfect, and there are always complicated circumstances. These tips can help and will hopefully encourage your spouse to also follow them as they see you modeling these behaviors. Don’t ever be afraid to reach out for help if you feel like things are unraveling. It’s totally okay to bring in a third party, like a counselor, to come alongside you and to help you work out some deeper issues. I’m praying that your marriage grows, thrives, and blesses you and that you experience a great life with your spouse!

Marriage as a Beautiful Investment: 10 Tips for a Lifetime of Growth